custody battle

Compiled by Cordell & Cordell Divorce Attorneys For Men

The divorce procedure is normally very difficult and trying for anyone experiencing information technology. Information technology is peculiarly hard if your divorce involves a kid custody battle.

These difficult times ofttimes cause a person to human activity or react irrationally and in ways that detrimentally impact his or her case.

You should be aware prior to court proceedings that the court volition evaluate your behavior in its entirety throughout the proceedings and always comport accordingly.

Below are some of the factors judges consider when making a child custody determination along with the ten most common mistakes made past men during custody battles. This should provide a checklist of what not to du during a custody battle.

Best Interest Of The Kid Standard

To determine how not to behave during your custody boxing, it is helpful to review the criteria used by the judge ("court") to decide appropriate placement of the children. The court is charged with the responsibility of evaluating the situation to make up one's mind what placement and parenting time is in the child'southward best involvement.

Some of the considerations include but are not express to:

a) The length of time that the kid has been under the actual intendance and command of any person other than a parent and the circumstances relevant thereto;

b) the desires of the parents as to residence-agreements reached past the parents and submitted to the court are usually presumed to be in the child's best interest;

c) the interaction and interrelationship of the child with parents, siblings, and any other person who may significantly affect the child's best interests;

d) the child's aligning to the his or her home, schoolhouse, and community;

e) the willingness and ability of each parent to respect and appreciate the bail betwixt the kid and the other parent and to permit for a continuing relationship between the child and the other parent;

f) any prove or accusation of spousal abuse;

1000) whatsoever evidence or allegation of child abuse on this or whatsoever other child;

h) whether either parent is required to register equally a sexual activity offender;

i) whether a parent is residing with a person who is required to register every bit a sexual activity offender;

j) whether a parent has been convicted of corruption of a child;

thousand) whether a parent is residing with a person who has been convicted of abuse of a kid

Picket Your Behavior

Whether yous are fighting to exist the primary residential parent or for weekend visits with your children, the evaluation process past the courtroom will embrace all of your behavior.

In item, wait your children'due south mother to point out all negative beliefs during your custody boxing. If you bear as though the judge were standing next to you each time you collaborate with the children or their mother, y'all will certainly avoid the pitfalls that will reduce your custody chances.

In reviewing the post-obit listing of what not to do during a custody boxing, keep in mind the fact that children are wonderful mimics. You should look your children to tell their female parent everything you tell them. Knowing this, y'all should exist aware of things said to the children or around the children that relate to their mother.

Conversations As Prove

You should besides anticipate your children's female parent hiding a tape recorder on or near her person when you interact. Recorded telephone conversations are mutual during divorce proceedings. In such cases, words spoken out of anger and frustration quickly become the rope that hangs the speaker.

Technically, such recordings should non be permissible, but some courts will hear them for the purpose of evaluating a parent's intentions and mental state. Do not exist defenseless on tape saying things y'all would not say with the judge present.

Information technology should get without maxim that any email or text message correspondence tin can exist hands handed to the judge for review so fits within the same admonition. The admission of such written lapses in judgment is much easier since y'all clearly knew information technology was documented at the time.

Cordell & Cordell understands the concerns men face during divorce.

This list is non exhaustive simply includes some of the most mutual mistakes fabricated by men during child custody battles. Equally an attorney, making certain clients avoid these missteps is vital in figuring out how to win child custody for fathers. Information technology is ofttimes an uphill climb due to the court'south bias against dads, simply fugitive cocky-inflicted mistakes is crucial.

1. Alienation of affection

Children thrive all-time in a two-parent household whenever possible. If a parent makes it a addiction to put downward the other parent, the children feel torn and forced to choose one parent over the other.

This is very frustrating and confusing for the children. Judges are quite familiar with the damage this behavior can crusade and are extremely intolerant when this beliefs occurs.

The two well-nigh common forms of alienation of affection that get dads into trouble are: criticizing mom around the kids and keeping the children from mom in any way. This behavior can lead to parental breach, which can have very harmful effects on children.

On the other hand, when the mother keeps the child from the father, parental alienation can occur, and that has serious ramifications.

2. Yell at wife and/or children

As covered to a higher place, assume all conversations are being recorded. When you lot yell at your wife or your children it often gives the appearance that you lot are being calumniating or bullying them.

Men are in a distinct position in this society where they are presumed to exist dominating and more than powerful than women (and of course children). That being the case, women are in a position to claim they are agape of their husband or the father of their children. Whether their fear is authentic or not, the court takes such allegations very seriously.

Do not give her whatever ammunition for the court. A tape recording of a telephone conversation or an in-person argument will appear to the court to demonstrate you losing control and possibly becoming dangerous.

No affair how difficult it becomes, fight the urge to yell at your married woman or your children. If that becomes a general rule y'all will non need to worry nearly such beliefs impeding you in court.

common divorce mistakes three. Have a physical confrontation with wife and/or children

Making concrete contact with some other person in a harmful or offensive manner is a offense. Some states call that crime "bombardment" others refer to it as "assault." Whatever the term, it is criminal.

You cannot very well care for your children from jail. No affair how upset you get during these proceedings, yous must not make physical contact with your wife or children when you are aroused.

If this is something that has occurred in the past, you demand to acknowledge that you are susceptible to such beliefs and go out the area when yous become upset. It is much ameliorate to walk away from an argument then to exist in a position where you have little or no time with your children or such fourth dimension is supervised past a stranger.

There are many women who are abusive toward their husbands. It is no less a criminal offence for a woman to be physically abusive toward y'all or your children. If you feel such a situation is going to occur, you lot should try to leave the surface area. If you experience the children are in danger, you plainly would not leave them solitary with her at that time.

If she hits, pushes, punches, or otherwise makes contact with y'all in an offensive way while she is angry, you demand to call the police force. Such beliefs should be reported. The constabulary will treat her the same mode they would have treated you and she will go to jail. Legislation related to domestic violence has increased over the years and police force enforcement no longer treats it as a family unit dispute.

Judges take these matters very seriously besides because physical violence between parents is very confusing and upsetting to children. Studies have shown that children who witness domestic violence from an early on age suffer developmental challenges as well equally life-long emotional problems.

iv. Motion in with a significant other

Divorce is a difficult time for children. It is hard for them to grasp the idea that their parents' love for each other can but end. Things are even more than hard when information technology becomes clear that the love transferred to a person that is non the kid's mother.

Courts are reluctant to betrayal children to such truths. Judges do not capeesh children beingness exposed to significant others while a divorce is proceeding.

Moreover, children are unlikely to be comfortable around the new woman and may refuse to stay overnight or even visit your home if she is at that place. That will certainly prevent you lot from having a healthy relationship with your children.

The time volition come when you are fix to commencement dating again later divorce, but until the divorce is final – and even for a while after – do non expose the children to a new woman.

five. Criticize mother to friends, family, case worker, or guardian ad litem

Keep in heed that your friends now are likely friends that were shared by both parties at one fourth dimension. You should expect friends to still talk to both parties. Assume comments you lot make will get back to your wife.

If a case worker or guardian ad litem is assigned to your case, be aware that they are looking intently for signs of alienation of affection. Practice non let them run across it coming from you. Focus on the good human relationship you lot accept with your children and how well you communicate. Do not waste time criticizing their mother. That is hands misinterpreted as breach of affection.

Caveat: if the children's mother is involved in illegal drug utilize or otherwise engaging in behavior that is dangerous to the children, this should exist brought to the attention of the case worker or guardian ad litem and closely investigated. Be certain you lot have some class of unbiased evidence before making such allegations or y'all again meet the problem of actualization to be trying to alienate the children from their female parent.

half dozen. Fail to pay kid back up

If the courtroom enters an gild of support and you choose to ignore it, that is considered contempt of court. If the guess makes a finding that yous are in contempt, you may be fined or fifty-fifty jailed for such behavior.

As a general dominion, judges feel that paying kid support is more important so any other financial obligations. Failure to pay child support appears to the court equally a lack of respect for the court and lack of concern for your children.

Plain information technology costs money to enhance children. Child support amounts are prepare using several variables to determine what it will take for the child to continue to survive as the child had prior to the breakup. Y'all may hire an experienced men's divorce attorney to fight the support amounts ordered if you have proficient crusade, just until the court orders otherwise, you are responsible for paying child back up as ordered.

If ordered to pay your wife directly, always do this by cheque and save the receipts from the banking concern showing these checks cleared. It is disquisitional that you can trace your child support payments in case your wife afterwards denies receiving cash payments.

7. Damage property belonging to mom or her family

Property impairment is often a sign of aggression that is building up in a person. Not only will the court brand you pay to supercede any damaged property, the court may also see you as a threat to your children due to such behavior.

8. Deny phone contact with mom when the children are with you

This relates back to the earlier topic on alienation of affection but may non ever exist as obvious. Even if you take limited fourth dimension with a child such as a couple hours a calendar week, you lot must let that child to phone call mom when requested.

In addition, if she calls to check on the child, you need to exist polite and allow her to talk to the child unless that would cause disruption or the child is sleeping. Keep in heed that such calls from mom must be reasonable.

Children should feel free to communicate with either parent at any time. If your wife denies you contact with your children when you call, be sure to keep a journal of the dates and times so the court may address it if it becomes a trouble. Yous should expect your wife is keeping a similar journal.

ix. Take kids out of the area without warning mom in accelerate

If you have a family vacation or reunion planned outside the metropolitan area in which you live, be sure that you take notified their mother before you have the children. Many parents reach understanding about vacation times with the children then that each parent has an opportunity to spend a calendar week or two out of town with the kids.

If you leave the area without notifying your wife, it may appear you are attempting to kidnap the children. That could result in her obtaining emergency orders restricting or terminating your parenting fourth dimension or custody. If at all possible, try to notify her in writing two weeks in advance and then there will exist no defoliation when the time comes.

10. Remove children from school or daycare without find to mom

Temporary orders will usually designate parenting time but rarely includes the time when the child is at schoolhouse or in daycare. If the school allows you to visit the children over luncheon or other times, you should freely exercise then as long as it is non a distraction.

You should never remove the children from school or daycare if yous are non the principal custodian. Even if yous are the main custodian, the children should remain in schoolhouse or daycare unless yous take a good reason to remove them.

Wait your married woman to bring the approximate a printout from the school that volition bear witness tardies and absences while the children are in your intendance. If you are not principal custodian, removal from school or daycare may appear that y'all are kidnapping the children and could result in serious restriction or full termination of your parenting time.

As experienced divorce litigators, we know how to win child custody for fathers, merely there are never any guarantees. We also know what non to do during a custody boxing and fugitive the above mistakes can at least keep you in the fight.

1 of the most important steps y'all tin take to help yourself in whatsoever child custody dispute is hiring a divorce lawyer to help with your case. Family law attorneys who focus on men'southward divorce and fathers' rights, such every bit the lawyers of Cordell & Cordell, accept a unique understanding of the challenges dads face throughout the process and can assistance position you for success in your child custody boxing.

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